The unsupportiveness of some people is unnerving! Yes I maybe talk a lot about my job, but my friends should realize this is uttermost important for me now. Like, I cannot talk about anything else! I really want this job with the big company, I think it�s an awesome opportunity and I will be upset if I don�t get it. Sure everyone said u did the best u could, etc. I agree, I did all I could, it�s out of my hands at this point. But it doesn�t mean I don�t worry, and it doesn�t mean I don�t really care � I do. If I don�t get it I will be very damn upset. Everyone�s like oh �whatever will be will be, you�ll find something else then.� Probably � but meanwhile I am still pretty focused on getting this job!

Yet all I got via e-mail from a certain someone was �I can�t talk about ur job anymore, I think u�re overthinking it, just chill� Well, sure, easy to say. As funny as it is, the only ppl who were supportive were my mom and my brother. They actually emphatized. Friends? Apparently my friends really don�t care enough. Oh well! Mike of course is nice about it but he doesn�t know how to be supportive. It�s not that he�s being mean � I honestly think, after 3 years of knowing him (altogether) that the concept of support was heavily missed somewhere. From what he tells me about his dad, obviously there was never support there, so.. Anyway, the best he can do is just say �all will be fine.� Sometimes I think � maybe I expect too much? Maybe I AM a psycho? But it�s just really hard for me right now, and when ppl who are supposed to be your circle of support say � I don�t want to talk about ur job� � well�

Anyway, I actually feel rather calm about things, I mean yes � I will find out on Monday (hopefully!) � yes, whatever will be will be � but I know that if it was my friends looking for jobs, I would be all cheering them on and making them feel good about themselves. No such luck here. Oh well! C�est la vie.